Ini kisah si JarmanSejati.
Those yang dok negara orang tu, probably dah banyak kali kot jumpa org camni. This is my first time, usually people here are curious but very understanding, unlike him. Dia ni special case kot.
My ex colleauge and current colleauge Mamak ialah Si JarmanSejati yang 100% berdarah turki. Darah jerrr, perangai Omputih you.
We all memang dah tau perangai dia suka provoke kita ni dgn soklan2 berkenaan agama Islam. Contohnya masa first time jumpa dia, kita tgk kulit dia ala2 coklat tu, kita tanya la, hang ni org turki ka?muslim? Terus dia hangguk. Ya, moslem.
Masa tu kita ni ilmu cetek didada. Naive.Hehe..kalau jumpa org muslim, trus cam sronok la. Ingatkan kalau ada org yang paham skit pasal Islam ni, senang skit. Since he said he's moslem, I thought takyah kita ni nak mengexplain kat colleague2 lain, awat posa, awat tak makan babi dan perkara2 yang sewaktu dengannya.
I consider myself a struggling learning moslem a.k.a Saya budak baru belajar. Setakat yang mampu tu kita buat and I try to be discreet about it. Why discreet? Sometimes I myself dont know the reason why I have to puasa, why I wasn't allowed pork and why I am suppose to pray 5 times a day. I must say, I do all this kat Malaysia without thinking much about it. Masa kecik2 dulu pulak, kalau tanya, my paktuk will say..hang kena posa la, kalau tak posa masuk neraka. Of course I accepted this explaination. Tapi takkan nak explain kat Jarman2 ni cam tu plak kan? So I was discreet because I was trying to avoid confrontation.
Soklan2 provokatif dari kenalan2 Jarman cthnya spt awat org laki Islam yg tua2 kat Afghanistan suka kawin ngn bdk pompuan 15thn. Mmg Islam cam2 ka? Ataupun soklan cepumas, awat takmau makan babi? Babi kat Jarman ni bersih, kami dapat sampel sosej babi kat lab mikrobiology kami, babi lagi bersih(bacterial contimination minima) dari ayam tau? And then, kalau husband awak nak kawen lain, awak takdak hak apa2 kan untuk menentang?
Ganas oo soklan2 depa, tambah2 lagi mereka ni very factual orientated, meaning kalau nak explain sesuatu kena berdasarkan fakta dan tidak bleh ada unsur2 sentiment. They dont accept crap like, dah kita ni pompuan, redha saja la.
Ghopa-ghopanya JarmanSejati ni pulak not practising moslem, itu hambe tak kisah because I know how hard it is to grow up here and be religious. I'm not saying its impossible, tapi susah. Still, dia bleh baca quran sbb pernah blajar masa kecik2 dulu, kira okayla tu. Anyway yang hambe kisah bab dia tak practice tu, tapi bakpe lak dia plak yang suka tanya soklan2 kontroversi kat hambe, plak tu depan2 matsalleh. Alahai, ingatkan ada backup sbb ilmuku cetek.
Tanya banyak2 pun takpa, I tak kisah sgt, sambil2 tu tambah ilmu, balik google, tanya sedara2, pi opis pastu explain semula. Tapi paling tak tahan, bila kami pi makan2, dia akan order wine. Lantakla kan, tapi dia akan layur2 gelas wine tu kat hidung hambe yang penyek ni, pastu tanya kita, sedap tak bau dia mami? Nak rasa mami? Ala rasa sikit takkan takleh kot? Aduss, mau aku tetak dia dengan butter knife tu. Matsalleh yang terang2an tak penah bercampur ngan org Islam pun tak buat camtu. Kita ni ckp sekali ja, I dont drink, lepas tu tak offer2 dah.
JarmanSejati nak justify his action,dengan niat memujuk kita ikut dia. Taklarat nak sound dah, ayat mami is 'hang takyah nak layur2 kat idong aku pun aku dah bau, kalau aku nak aku order sendiri'. Lepas tu kalau balik tmpt gheja, I remember he will bring the theme up again. He will say, why dont you drink, almost no alcohol in it, you wont get drunk.Then I will tell him, hg nak minum, minum la, aku takmau minum. Apa yang dia kata pas2, why dont you want to drink? Soalan ni akan ignite peperangan mulut antara hambe dan dia.
My problem is that he ask not to get answer. He ask to provoke. Bila dah bagitau why, he doesnt respect my opinion just because it is different as his. His biggest theme to ask me is about drinking alcoholic drink and posa. Soalan paling bangang yang pernah dia tanya mami is 'What if you are a tennis player that has to practice everyday? Camna nak posa?'
Aduss, dia yang gheja lab takyah peluh2 siap curi tulang tu awatnya takmau posa, kalaupun tenisplayer tu takleh nak posa. Paling takbes is bila kita posa, dia layur2 bekalan makanan dia soh kita ni bukak posa.
Anyway hatiku puas bila pakcik R, my colleague gak yang dah pencen recently (very pious Catholic) sound si JarmanSejati. That time JarmanSejati dok try persuade me to drink, as usual he said, ala sikit saja, tak mabuk pun. Mami yang malas layan tgk ja muka pakcik R yang tiba-tiba bersuara..Hang toksah dok suruh dia minum, dalam Koran tulih setitik pun haram. Takkan hang taktau, mak bapak tak ajaq ka!
Senyap terus si JarmanSejati.
Pandai pulak diam bila matsalleh bersuara.
