Pondering Thoughts : Wisdom vs. Money

I know I said I was only updating my blog on the weekends, but hey, I have only two classes in the afternoon today, so why not. This blogging thing is getting pretty addictive, ain't it?

Anyway, I was just thinking or pondering. I love to ponder, I guess it is because I am a woman. My husband is always telling me, don't think too much about irrelevant things, but do I listen? Not really, cause I guess it's natural to ponder or overthink as a woman. It's a part of our self-security mechanism, is not to be understood by the other gender. I sort of half listen to my husband in a way that I ponder things in the wasatiah way, not too much, not too little and only when the time is right.

Wisdom versus Money

Well this time I like to ponder about my future. Being my nosy self, I saw some pictures of a friend of a friend, using the infamous Facebook of course, who I know personally to be filthy rich. I saw pictures of him with his rich family, 'richly' dressed, 'richly' travelled and with his 'richly' stuff, you know, sports car and stuff.

I barely know this rich boy but he is famous for his good looks, his way with girls and his reputation of driving around town with his mercedes benz. I know he flunked private college, but hey I know a thing or two about flunking, so I am not judging. So he uses his time buffing up his good looks by going to the gym or having laser treatment on his zits. It sounds horribly stereotypical and cheesy isn't it?

But that's the way the story goes. I don't know if he's a nice guy or not, or if he is happy or not, since I have only exchanged a few words with him, so I can fairly say, that those things I wrote is only what I see and ponder privately. Well blogging about it makes it not so private, but he remains anonymous because you'll meet this stereotypical rich boy anywhere in this world. He is merely an example. Oh before I go on any further, I DO NOT HATE rich people, this article is simply my view and comparison.

Anywaaay, though he hadn't much of an education, he got a job, of course at his dad's company and of course received 'richly' salary monthly. I couldn't stop myself from comparing this young rich boys life to mine. How money can actually save your butt if you mess up.

My life on the other hand, leaves no room to mess up. I have taken responsibility for my mistakes since I left home 6 years ago. If I mess up, I will have to pay. If I had to pay, I had to pay immediately. I know that many feels this way about their lives or am I alone?

This young rich boy has so much room to mess up and doesn't have to pay for his mistakes. Am I envious? Of course I am, I am only human and by the way who wouldn't be jealous?.. but I don't mean him no harm. Good for him. I am just saying. I mean, if I mess up, I would have to clean the mess myself. If I flunk, there's nobody there to give me a job with 'richly' salary. You know, this young rich boy has to only be a teensy weeny bit smart and he can surely make it in life. 

I mean, he has a job, probably has good bussines contacts everywhere and can talk about anything he wants and he would sound so smart, because he is smartly dressed and drive a good looking car. Our social system made us that way, we tend to think that people who are smartly dressed are trustworthy and those who do not are criminals (of course I am not generalising, please do not misunderstand).

People like me, however in most cases, have to work our butts off, be as clever and educated as we can be and still more than often get looked down upon, simply because unlike the young rich boy, we own two huge empty pockets instead of a bad-ass sports car. I am not talking about happiness, butterflies and unicorns. That's a totally different story.

This makes me a little scared about my future. I want to be a mother someday and I don't think I can back my children up in the future. Like me they are going to have to clean their mess themselves and I will helping as much as I can, since I can't imagine myself reaching the filthy rich level even if I live to be 100.

What about this young rich boys children? They are probably going to have better chance in life won't they, just because their father and their grandfather are rich? Could this go on for generations to come?

 
Probably that is why I need to find knowledge because I want to, not find knowledge to get rich. At my naive 17 years of age, I always thought that if I study hard enough, I will be rich someday. I could have my big car, big house and of course my big paycheck. I laugh sometimes thinking about my dreams and hopes as I was younger. So innocent and so sacred.
 
 I feel differently now, I think the maturing thing is kicking in slowly. I now practice Ikhlas. Ikhlas in gaining knowledge because it is wajib to be knowledgable. If I am not ikhlas, my soul will be broken someday, because I will be dissapointed if I fail.

Life is unfair. The faster I learn to accept that, the better. I guess, no matter how smart you are, no matter how hard you try, someday you will always see someone on your side who got to your level the shorter and easier way.

Being a bittter loser at my end, there is only one thing I am sure of, I would rather be respected for my wisdom than money.